multi-faceted abnormal

Snow

Mon, 02 Feb 2009 11:33:23 GMT

It's snowing.

Well not currently "snowing" but it was like 2 hours ago.
And it did all last night meaning when I woke up this morning everything was pretty and white and pure.

Now everything is kinda white, kinda slushy with footprints, tyre tracks and suchlike.

Still kinda pretty wonderland though.

92 Posts

Fri, 09 Jan 2009 14:52:29 GMT

At the start of 2008 I made a post complaining that I'd only posted 8 times and this was shit.

I'm glad to say, by the end of 2008 I had made 92 posts.

I'm happy with this.

Writers Block

Thu, 07 Aug 2008 20:50:41 GMT

I want to do a horror movie for my creative project this year.
I want to do something good, scary not cheesy, and something that's hopefully not overdone.
I had an idea the other day - nothing concrete though.

I now have complete writers block/ideas block/everything block.

I know I want to do some kind of ghost story. I know I can't have a huge cast - because it's hard enough trying to cast a small group of people. I know I can't have extreme sets because they are too unrealistic. I know starting two months before I have to go back is a good idea because hopefully it won't leave me stressed out.

I just wish I could think of something to write.

What to write? What to write?

My head is actually empty. Completely empty.

Maybe I shouldn't do a horror - although I really want to. But I want it to be amazing, I want to fully put the work in this year and create something I'm really proud of. I just wish I knew what.

Meme

Mon, 28 Jul 2008 18:31:45 GMT

1. Name 5 places you want to go and why.
1) Orlanda (again) - because every time my family go I want to go again but never can afford it, or its the wrong time of year or whatever. I'd just love to do it all again.
2) Australia - because I think it would be a really nice country, and good for a girls holiday. And neighbours is filmed there :)
3) Hollywood - for the shopping/sight-seeing/celeb spotting alone. and come on, im a film buff.
4) France - because I can speak the language so why shouldn't i go visit
5) erm... i'll leave this one open to decide at a later time :)

2. Whats your faveourite thing about a book (like spine, pages, colour smell ANYTHING)
how crisp the pages are, and that its perfect with the unbent spine. they you start reading it and it all goes to hell. but its a good story.

3. Tea or coffee why? and how (do you make it)
neither.
unless i make it for peter. then its tea. hot water, one sugar, and a dollup of milk.

4. you have $10, 000.... what are you doing with it?
i'm paying off my £3000 loan, paying off all my other debts, then buy a second hand car and dunno... thats probably it gone or most of it.

5. Your fave fairy Tale and why
definately not Cinderella, it pisses me off.
Beauty and the beast was always a favourite, and lil red riding hood.

You Gotta Go There To Come Back

Mon, 30 Jul 2007 23:56:52 GMT

... this post isn't actually a proper post... its more just some drawings I did recently... that actually worked out :O

me and sarah... a take on this photo.... http://www.bebo.com/PhotoAlbumBig.jsp?MemberId=747948385&PhotoAlbumId=4940756615&PhotoId=4940778977 .... except i cut out Nev.

words read: "i just wanna scream and lose control.... life is so hard it hurts like hell... forget about everything and runaway"... guess the song?

words read: "let me be the one to catch you when you fall" and then "if you need to fall apart i can mend a broken heart"... again song guessage?

Words: "i've been looking for an original sin. one with a twist and a bit of a spin"... go on... guess!

sorry about the quality... there are issues with not having a scanner.

also sorry about taking up all your friendpage space with doodles... i shoulda put them under a cut... and now cant be bothered going back to fix it.

Life In A Glass House

Sun, 22 Jul 2007 22:10:59 GMT

Forgot to mention:

Photos from Wickerman are on my bebo.

http://www.bebo.com/Profile.jsp?MyProfile=Y

I think its fair to say they deserve their own post, because not only are they amazing but there are also about 150 - 170 of them. Lot of photos. But have a look and comment them anyway.

Thu, 12 Jul 2007 17:33:52 GMT

my laptop died stupid cunt that it is.

so therefore i have to buy a new one... so might not be updating much for the next couple of days.

:(

Sat, 16 Jun 2007 13:23:30 GMT

So Andie had the strangest idea to send me an E-Card every day until my birthday this year... which is strange idea but I frigging love it!

Here's the first one: http://www.hallmark.com/ECardWeb/ECV.jsp?a=2502132472956M205188126Y&product_id=

Anyway... I will update this properly tonight.

The White Stuff

Sun, 03 Jun 2007 13:26:52 GMT

Cut for images.

HAHA. The fun I have.

<3

Hee Hee

Mon, 07 May 2007 18:58:14 GMT

I made another video.

Major OTH spoiler for season 4... so if you watch and aren't all the way caught up go here [ username: nathan passcode: jersey23 ] and catch up. Then watch it :P

Anyway...what else to write about. Not really sure tbh. Nothing major to report.

Fri, 26 Jan 2007 15:53:28 GMT

Exams = Shit!

So I had my British TV Drama exam today. I didn't actually think it was too awful. But I have the feeling I usually get after an exam where I think I've totally fucked everything up. Didn't help that I got my coursework assignment back and got like a C... well dissappointed. I really don't wanna have to do any resits. I hate the prospect of having to do resits. I mean technically my essay still passed, but I kinda pride myself that I'm a B average student. I don't want a C. BLEH!

Anyway. What else. Haven't really updated much recently. Just been kinda busy.

14. Start hip hop lessons with Kayleigh, and Lippo.
15....

Hip Hop was such a laugh. Can't wait to go again next week. Its fun. Muchas dancing around like a spam which was funny.

I've got a week off from uni at the moment. I don't really want it. I want second semester to start already so I can be back at uni. I hate long holidays. I mean at school they were amazing because I didn't really wanna be in school but I wanna be in uni. Although part of me is kinda dreading it because I don't want it to be awkward with the Peter thing. Most of me, just wants to be back at uni!

Speaking of the Peter thing. I think I'm kinda over it. Well at some points I am. I mean, I'm not really angry any more which has to be a good thing. I mean, obviously I'm not exactly happy go lucky about the whole thing, but I mean I'm not holding onto my anger anymore. I think I've just gotten to the stage where I'm not really caring too much. Although I'm still guarded, which I don't like. Its annoying me that I've put up walls, and although they ain't huge walls, they're still there. But I get on with it.

Mostly my life is good just now. I'm happy. I suppose that's a good thing. But I've got that nagging feeling that something just isn't quite right. I mean I look at my life, and its good, its pretty good actually. I think I'm just looking for something to make it great. Maybe that's just asking too much?

Drawings...

Mon, 15 Jan 2007 16:06:59 GMT

I already posted these on Myspace... but thought I'd put them here as well. Incase you haven't guessed... I'm bored.

I've actually got another couple ready to scan... but that involves going to said scanner and doing it. Which I suppose I could do just now. Hmm. Yes I may do this. Now. Got nothing else to do.

Sun, 07 Jan 2007 22:37:15 GMT

It has been said that “Semiotics makes us aware that the cultural values with which we make sense of the world are a tissue of conventions...”. This means that the way we are brought up and the cultures we are raised in and exposed to have an affect on how we determine information from images that we see every day. By looking into the study of semiotics we can further analyse how our cultural heritage can help us to understand what we are seeing when exposed to images. Today's society is an increasingly visual one, and we are exposed to so many images every day that they have become natural to us, what we don't realise is how much information we gather from them without consciously trying to analyse them. Semiotics helps us to understand why we interpret this information, and by looking at the works of key theorists we can start to gain an understanding of how different cultures understand images and the messages conveyed in them differently.
Semiotics when understood on a basic level is a communication of meaning which challenges the idea that communicating is nothing more than a simple process of the transmission of a message and the reception of the concept conveyed within that message. Semiotics allows us to look into how our methods of communicating can open up different possibilities for our interpretation and allows us to construct different meanings from different texts we are exposed to. When looking into the study of semiotics there are key theorists to which we must look to aid our understanding of the concepts involved with the study of semiology, these are Ferdinand De Saussure, Roland Barthes, and Charles Pierce.
Ferdinand De Saussure (1857 – 1913) was a Swiss born linguist who saw language as a system of signs that were not done according to any plan or for any particular reason. Language, made up of these signs, or words, was always open to interpretation based on our social and cultural understanding of what we encountered.

Merry Christmas

Sun, 24 Dec 2006 23:49:08 GMT

Merry Christmas Everyone.
Hope that Santa is good to you.
Have a great day!!!!

xxxxxxxxxxx

I Give Up

Mon, 11 Dec 2006 01:32:12 GMT

I can't do it anymore. I won't. Its over. As far as I'm concerned its finished. I can't keep driving myself insane. I won't. I'm just finished. I give up.

Meatloaf In Uni

Wed, 06 Dec 2006 13:06:30 GMT

I'm in uni and listening to Mealoaf - which is jumping because cinema Pete's CD is a bit fucked :(

But the main is that point I'm listening to Meatloaf and he is the sex.

I haven't properly updated this thing in ages! I mean I've put little mini posts and shit but still so since class isn't in session today I'm actually going to update this thing XD feel privilged that you special people will actually get to read this update because its filtered so not many people will get at it.

I actually enjoyed work last night, t'was the sex. Haven't enjoyed work in a while. Think it was just because the place was kinda dead so I could just sit and watch DVDs and I actually did uni work. WOW. I've said actually a fair bit already. Is that my word of the day or something???

Uni this week is a bit kinda stressful. Got to finish CV2, well don't actually need it finished but I'd like a lot of it done. We also have a week (not that we've left things to the last minute or anything) to do the O+E presentation. On the plus side I planned most of mine last night at work. XD

Thursday is the Xmas party at the union. Which is tomorrow. That keeps biffing me out because I'm totally confused as to what day it is. I blame the vitamins and minerals that Mum is insisting I take. Thats the last time that I tell her I'm feeling run down... or the last time I tell her why I'm feeling run down. Just cause like I'm in one of those not eating phases (its not too bad yet so I don't want STOP THAT comments thanks) and like not sleeping, and like drinking, and working lots, and doing lots of uni stuff. OK thats bound to run a girl down, doesn't mean I need to take stupid vitamin suppliments.

OH! That thing I posted about a while ago that thing I was doing that I probably shouldn't have been doing and that was a bad thing or whatever... yeah, well don't worry I'm still doing it. LOL. But its not as big an issue for me anymore, things are different now so its not as bad. Granted I'm still gonna get hurt because lets face it I'm still being a total idiot but not a complete idiot anymore. Booya.

Erm what else do I have to post about???

i love christie by kayleigh <---- aww kayleigh loves me. i feel loved and shit. *smiles*

The Game Of Life - Unchangable And Cruel

Wed, 29 Nov 2006 06:24:55 GMT

Is it really worth it? Is any of this really worth anything? I don't know. I'm starting to feel like its just one big game, the game called "life". But I'm not sure if I want to play anymore. I mean whats the point? People always leave, people always lie, people always pretend, people always go away, people always hurt you. And I always let them.

Why do I always let them? Is it really because I'm scared to feel something other than pain? I've become so used to making it a part of my life, forcing myself to feel hurt and angry, or disappointed because maybe I'm scared to feel other things. Scared to let go, and let people in, in a way scared to let myself be happy?

The way I see it, this grand old game of life comes with a set of rules, like any other board game. Rules like roll the dice and take your turn, move the correct amount of spaces until you reach a destination. Try and best the other players until you are victorious. Collect cards and tokens along the way that will aid you in your game. Most importantly, get caught cheating and be ready for a fall.

These rules can be related to different aspects of our life. Rolling the dice and moving is like getting up in the morning. The basic rule of life, you've got to get up and live it. Besting the other players is like beating out your competition, beating those in your class for the top grade, winning the heart of someone over someone else. The cards and tokens are our friends, our family, those we're supposed to trust and love. Cheating... well that's basically doing anything you're not supposed to.

What happens if you roll the dice and don't like your destination? You end up at the top of snake, falling down quickly? What if you can't best the other players because you'd like to believe you're not that ruthless? What happens when the cards and tokens you collect do you no good? And what happens when you go straight to jail, without passing go, without collecting £200?

I've been playing this game for 19, almost 20 years. No one asked me if I wanted to play, no one asks if I want a time out, a coffee break, or just a break in general; with or without the caffinated beverage. I think I want a break. I think that things are just too much sometimes, and that I need a break, a free parking space, to collect my thoughts before my next dice roll. But you don't get break in the game of "life". You don't get to stop and take a look around, collect your thoughts, and evaluate things before going on. This is something I've learnt - you've just gotta keep playing no matter what. It doesn't matter if your heart is broken, the world won't stop and allow you to grieve. It doesn't matter how good a friend is, they are going to hurt you at some point. Your game play can change in a matter of seconds, but you have to keep playing.

There are no breaks... until death.

Death is the ultimate break. Death is game over. Death is the easy option for those who aren't sure if they want to play. But death is also too final to even consider.

I don't think I want to play games anymore. I don't want to keep going round and round a board, arriving at "go" often unchanged by my circle, and weary at the thought of travelling the board again. My game piece is worn, in tatters. Shredded by playing this game for so long, playing the game to no avail, being no closer to winning anything, and with each circle becoming more and more confused about the game itself.

Everyone plays the game of life. This is obvious. But does everyone struggle at it? Of course. Have there been other people whose games have followed a pattern similiar to mine? Sure there have. Are there people that want to stop playing? Yes. Are there people who give up? Every day. Will I give up? Honestly? Right now... I'm not sure.

But I think I've been sent straight to jail, I haven't passed "go", there is no money in my account, no tokens in my corner, and I'm sliding on every snake I pass, and arriving at destinations that prove confusing to this once good girl.

Wed, 15 Nov 2006 12:39:50 GMT

Money is shit.

Yes its one of these money posts again.

By the end of this month I need to have £310 in my bank account. By then end of this week I will have £105...still leaving me with £205 to pay off. I won't have it. This is shit. Last thing I needed to add to my down-ness right now. Where is the nearest bridge?

Fri, 27 Oct 2006 18:22:17 GMT

Last night was the Halloween party at the union. It was awful. Worst night in a good long time, I'm not even going to vent about it here. I just wanna forget the whole thing... unfortunately though I wasn't drunk enough to forget it... drunk enough to fall three times and have dramatics but not drunk enough to forget. Which sucks.

I'm working in a couple of hours. I really cannot be bothered. I just want to stay in bed. But I shall go to work. I shall do the working thing. I won't make a million mistakes and everything will be better. I'm currently debating whether or not I want to take my laptop into work with me. Part of me thinks yes I want the laptop in because if not I'll be really really bored and want to watch movies. The other part is saying if you take the laptop you'll make lots of mistakes and end up beating yourself up about it. I think I'll leave the laptop at home. Take my doodle pad because I'm in a very lets do some emo doodling whilst listening to music on my MP3 player mood. I'll also take in study stuff and try to get some studying done because I'm getting to that freaking out stage of the year. Major freaking about my exams. I've decided to make Tuesday's my study in the library day, I only have class until four and then I don't work it so I can study for the like the rest of the day if I wanted. This week - British TV drama. Oh the joys.

For now I'm going to try and make myself look presentable for work. Hopefully I'll pull it off.

Sun, 22 Oct 2006 03:09:25 GMT

Updated my icons... and for once I'm not actually using all my own creations but I found some others that I'd saved randomly in my documents folder. Found them thought OMG so pretty... if they happen to be yours or you know where I found them let me know so I can credit.

AND let me know what you think of my new icons!

XD

Make-Up For Mummies

Sat, 07 Oct 2006 13:50:31 GMT

Ok, so Mum's going out tonight and doesn't know what makeup to wear or how to apply it because normally I do her makeup for her before she goes out. So this is going to have a Makeup for Mummies entry that'll only be here until I can get on the computer downstairs to print it.

MAKEUP FOR MUMMIES:

1. Blend collection 2000 foundation over your face. Only use a small amount as you don't need it for coverage just for an even skin tone.
2. Start on your eyes next. Using 2true eye colours. There is a pale one and a dark one (be careful with the dark one cause its broken into pieces so don't spill it) SLIGHT CHANGE cause I just spilt the darker one, use your darker eye shade cause it was the same colour and just follow the instructions for the darker one.
3. Blend the lighter colour over your eyelid, and a small amount directly under your eyebrow.
4. Get the darker colour and blend out away from the corner of your eye, making the colour darker the further away from the corner you get.
5. Take the lighter colour again and place it at the corner of your eye, making it lighter again. The darker colour shouldn't be visible until about half way across your eyelid.
6. Take the collection 2000 kohl eyeliner and line your top lid. Don't use the Dior one as the collection 2000 one is actually better.
7. Take the black revlon eye shadow and blend a very very small amount into the darkner shade on your eye. DON'T use a lot otherwise you'll bypass the glamour look and hit evil goth.
DON'T put any dark colours anywhere about the crease in your eyelids. The only colour that should be higher up than that is the lighter one.
8. Curl your eyelashes
9. Using the lash stylish mascara gently do one layer - this is the mascara with the comb instead of the brush so be careful.
10. Next get the 2true blusher. Smile when putting blusher on and using the biggest brush gently sweep it across the apples of your cheeks. Making sure to brush outwards from your nose. Keep the colour light otherwise its clown college for you. :P
11. Take the 2true mascara now and gently do another layer of this mascara over the one your wearing to get more defined lashes. Also use this mascara to put a thin layer on your bottom lashes.
12. Use the missy Sporty powder to gently finish the look, brushes all over your face to create a matt look. Watch you don't smudge your mascara.

OPTION THINGS:

1. Using the Rimmel eyebrow pencil, gently colour in your eyebrows and then use the brush to smudge the colour.
2. Line your lower eye with the same eyeliner for more glamour and definition. But remember you'll get that black junk in the corner of your eye which is never a good look!
3. Use the 2true lipstick (in a black tube) its kinda light brown in colour.
4. Use the 2true lipgloss - its a sticky one - to add a sheen to your lips.

HAIR

1. Wash.
2. Don't put any product in it! This is why your hair isn't as shiney as you'd like it to be because the product is bogging it down! If you must use anything use the smallest amount of moose. I'm talking less than a golf ball sized amount. Spread evenly through hair.
3. Blow dry using a round brush, and blow dry in sections rather than just tipping your head upside down.
4. Brush with a different brush. Then gently spray with the KZ Designer Spray. Hold it at least 15 cm away, this will bring out any layers.

OPTIONS:

1. Straighten. Use the GHD's, and gently straighten the top layer. Do this before using KZ spray otherwise you'll damage my straighteners and I'll kick your butt!

Sun, 01 Oct 2006 16:45:25 GMT

First week of uni is finished. And I'm totally exhusted for it. Like dead. And it all starts again tomorrow. Thankfully I have tomorrow off from work. So I can go *squee* day off. Lol.

I'm feeling uber creative lately - so much so that after I've posted this update I'm going to go downstairs (cause I'm also feeling a lil bit lonely up here in my bedroom) and make a new background... naturally it will be OTH themed cause its me. XD

And! If I get any decent script ideas popping into my head I will be writing them tonight at work - so hopefully we'll be fairly quiet and I can just put on music (quietly of course) and sit and write without too many interruptions. So people send me the creativity muse and hope that I can get some good script ideas cause I'm dying to write! I wanna write! Now!

I asked Dad for a loan of money today. Its only gonna be like £40 but thats still a lot for me because I've gotten used to being rather self-sufficient and not needing to ask my parents for money. So I really hate having to ask, but its either that or get charges on my DP card which I really don't want. I figure everything will be cool.

So found out last night that they are changing Steph's meds again. Apparently she's now schizophrenic as well as all the other things. :S Isn't life fun!

CREATIVE NOW!!!

Tue, 05 Sep 2006 17:56:00 GMT

OK, so the bar is actually dead right now and I'm bored beyond belief. I have 2 hours and 15 minutes left, and soon my songs will run out on the jukebox, then I'll have nothing but the TV and my book to entertain myself...

Although I just totally jinxed myself. Got 4 customers in now, plus Dego a.k.a most annoying pervy customer in the world. And to top all that oof my Miller ust went off and I'm not 100% sure how to change kegs. Fabulous!

Despite the boredom I was actually looking foreward to my afternoon by myself. Or with just a couple of random customers but why oh why do I need to get Dego? He's currently inviting me to Jamica for a "holiday and more" Eww! You horrible old tits pervert! Crazy old tits pervert! He's actually crazy and like... I don't like him... like not at all. Grr Arg

***

That was this afternoon. I'm now at home. I'm kinda sleepy, and wanna go for a bath but can't actually be bothered.

On another note I finally found my 2nd year timetable so I can now try and work my shifts at Harbie and at the bar in around my uni.

First Semester

Monday - CV2 = no work
Tuesday - Visual Culture (1-4) = Fort 5pm - 11pm??? Will have to ask Norma about that.
Wednesday - No Classes = Harbie 430 - 12
Thursday - No Classes = Fort 11 - 5
Friday - Opportunity and Explotation (10-1), British TV Drama (1-4) = no work... hopefully.

Second Semester

Monday - No Classes = Fort 11 - 5
Tuesday - Cyber Culture (1-4) = no work
Wednesday - Scotland Media and Identity (10-1) = Harbie 430 - 12
Thursday - Media and Society (10-1) = Fort 2 - ?? Again will have to talk to Norma
Friday - Print Journalism (10-1) = I haven't decided yet.

Seems like I'll be OK working things in for semester one but the second one seems like it'll be harder to work with. I may need to consider giving up one of the jobs for the second semester. Who knows. I'll see what I can work out.

So at least thats sorted. I also found out that I enroll on the 19th of September. Which is fairly soon. YAY! I can't wait to go back to uni. Its been too damn long.

My tattoo appointment is on Friday. Kinda nervous about it but also really excited at the same time. It should be good, and hopefully not uberly painful... but probably will be painful... just hopefully not uberly. Hmmm. That sentence was kinda silly sounding but I don't care.

:P

Sun, 30 Jul 2006 01:46:34 GMT

OMG Im so drunk right now im not evden sure this os making sens! hAHAHAHAH! Its really suny vut I'm not even sure I'm makinf wense. {art opf me think siM talking totaly anse... but i suppose thae srunkhen partr of me knows this isn't even making snese.

JAJAJAQ i sguls just fo to slepp! ###

xxx

A Doodle... I Do Doodle... You Do Doodle Too!

Sat, 29 Jul 2006 03:11:01 GMT

Random doodling mood. I don't really know why I've been doodling but I have. I'm actually thinking I have a spec of artistic talent this week. YAY!